WASHINGTON D.C. – US President Donald Trump offered warm wishes to the family of Nancy Guthrie, the mother of Today Show host Savannah Guthrie, after confirming that her kidnapping earlier this ...
Trump threatens more attacks on Nigeria unless their prince returns his money
WASHINGTON, DC – President Donald Trump recently took to his Truth Social media platform to warn Nigeria that it will be targeted with more airstrikes, unless “Prince Adewale Oluewesan ret...
Doubles Luge canceled as Olympics runs out of condoms
CORTINA, ITALY — Following the news that the 2026 Milano Cortina Winter Olympics had run out of condoms, the International Olympic Committee was forced to call off the doubles luge event. “Today is a ...
Elon Musk downgrades empty Mars Colony pledge to empty Lunar Colony pledge
BROWNSVILLE, TX – Tech visionary Elon Musk astounded observers when he set aside more than a decade of unfulfilled vows to colonize the Red Planet in favour of the seemingly more modest goal of ...
Heated Rivalry season two to follow hockey players who secretly don’t cheat on their wives
OTTAWA – After a universally beloved first season of ground-breaking television, Heated Rivalry season two has been green-lit with a story following two new hockey players hiding their in-infide...
Billionaires who lobbied Trump to halt Canadian bridge praise EZ-Bribe App
DETROIT, MI – Billionaire Matthew Moroun, whose family recently lobbied the Trump administration to publicly threaten the Gordie Howe International Bridge which competes with their interests, ha...
CBC Gem crashes due to Canadians using it
TORONTO – With record numbers of Canadians viewing the Winter Olympic Games on CBC Gem, the streaming platform experienced several outages due to what’s being called “an unprecedented number of people...
Trump threatens bridge to prevent Canadians from visiting country Canadians do not want to visit
WASHINGTON, D.C. – U.S . President Donald Trump has threatened to halt the opening of a international bridge linking Windsor and Detroit, excluding Canadians from country that they have absolute...
OpenAI promises new safeguards to prevent suicide-related lawsuits
SAN FRANCISCO, CA – Facing allegations that their ChatGPT LLMs have been responsible for numerous user suicides, OpenAI responded swiftly by insisting the company will develop new proactive meas...
USA wins gold at Super Bowl
SANTA CLARA, CA – Team USA is triumphantly announcing their third gold medal since the start of the Milano-Cortina Winter Olympics, in the much-watched Super Bowl event. “No other country ...
