TORONTO – With the official announcement of Toronto gaining Canada’s first WNBA franchise, the city is buzzing about what the new expansion team will be called. The team won’t b…
Toronto
Amazing! Bald eagles seen living in Toronto with zero roommates!
TORONTO – Local naturalists received a miraculous surprise last week after a pair of bald eagles were seen building a nest in Toronto, with zero evidence of having an unrelated roommate to …
Toronto Police advise banks to leave big pile of money at the door to avoid being robbed
TORONTO – In response to a growing rash of armed robberies throughout the city, Toronto Police advised Canada’s banks to leave a big pile of money at the door of every branch to avoid being…
Eglinton LRT builders mail ransom note, severed piece of track, to Torontonians
TORONTO – With the Eglinton LRT transit extension multiple years behind schedule, and no firm completion date in sight, the various firms contracted with building the project have sent a ra…
Toronto Liberal MPs accuse Olivia Chow of trying to help Toronto
TORONTO – Several Toronto-area Liberal MPs have furiously accused the city’s newly-elected mayor of a devious and irresponsible plot to “actually advocate for Toronto”. &#…
The 9 people that own all of Toronto’s real estate extremely upset about property tax hike
TORONTO – Reacting to news of Toronto Mayor Olivia Chow’s plan to hike property taxes by more than 10%, the 9 or so people that collectively own all Toronto real estate expressed outrage, s…
Just to be cautious, Ontario announces Eglinton LRT will be open by the year 2236
TORONTO – In an effort to assuage concerns regarding the long overdue Eglinton Crosstown LRT, Premier Doug Ford has announced a cautiously optimistic opening date of 2236. “I’m very pleased to fi…
Man who hates Toronto worried Olivia Chow will ruin it
Oshawa, ON – Ever since Olivia Chow was sworn in as Toronto’s mayor local Durham resident and avowed Toronto hater Sean Buffett has repeatedly expressed his concerns that her leadersh…
Mayor-elect Olivia Chow currently riding bike to go do donuts on Doug Ford’s lawn
TORONTO – Following her victory in last night’s citywide election, mayor elect Olivia Chow has announced that her first order of business will be to ride her bike directly to Etobicok…
Quiz: Who should you vote for in Toronto’s Mayoral Race
It’s sex scandal caused election day in Toronto! The city is ready to move on from legendary horn dog John Tory and install a new Strong Mayor. But which of the 500 candidates deserves your…