TORONTO – A last minute rule change by FIFA means World Cup fans will no longer be able to bring the moisture inside their own bodies into host stadiums for the tournament. The latest FIFA …
Sports
Nation’s sports franchises mark Pride Month with the annual closing of the comment section
TORONTO – In what has become an annual tradition in community outreach, sports teams across Canada are marking June as Pride Month by adding rainbow logos to their profile pictures, releasi…
Canada ends agonizing three-year Walter Cup drought
MONTREAL — The Montreal Victoire have won the PWHL’s Walter Cup, ending an excruciating three-year period where the championship resided south of the border. “I’m honoured to have helped bring a …
Sundin: “Don’t worry, I’m used to propping up inept teammates in Toronto”
TORONTO – As the Maple Leafs unveil franchise great Mats Sundin as Senior Executive Advisor and Wendy’s franchisee John Chayka as GM, Sundin is assuring fans that he is used to succee…
Canada uses new sovereign wealth fund to buy Saudi Arabian soccer team
OTTAWA — Prime Minister Mark Carney has announced that the first use of Canada’s new sovereign wealth fund will be to purchase a Saudi Arabian soccer team and festoon it with Canadian branding. “…
Oilers fans furious that play they admit was a goal was called a goal
EDMONTON – In the wake of the Oilers loss last night, which has put them on the wrong side of a 3-1 series lead, Oilers fans are furious that the referees called Anaheim’s OT winner a…
Local man sent for psych evaluation after saying he enjoys sports without gambling
WINNIPEG – Local crisis workers have sent 32-year-old Ronald Alexander to Victoria General Hospital for psychological tests following disturbing reports that he has “never put money down on a sin…
US loses World Baseball Classic bet, has to give Venezula their oil back
WASHINGTON, DC – Following their upset victory in the World Baseball Classic finals against the United States, the Venezuelan interim government is immediately collecting their winnings fro…
Max Scherzer re-signs with Blues Jays for chance to win, get even with guy who cut him off on DVP
DUNEDIN, FL – In an effort to address unresolved trauma from the 2025 season, veteran pitcher ‘Mad’ Max Scherzer announced he will re-sign with the Toronto Blue Jays to give himself another shot …
Heated Rivalry fans unfamiliar with concept hockey players might be gross
TORONTO – Fans of the smash hit romance show Heated Rivalry, many of whom have also become fans of hockey, are expressing confusion at the discovery that the overwhelming majority of real l…
