TORONTO – Facing a record low approval rating and a 2018 re-election campaign, Ontario Premier Kathleen Wynne is citing the opening of a Toronto-area Cheesecake Factory as proof that she is brin...
Tory scientists begin thawing cryogenically frozen John Diefenbaker for late leadership run
CARP, ON – Deep inside the Diefenbunker, Conservative scientists have started the process of thawing a cryogenically frozen former Prime Minister to give their party a better shot at winning the...
Major cookie conglomerate expects record sales thanks to child labour initiative
KITCHENER, ON – Dare Foods CEO Martin Schmitt told investors on a conference call he expects record sales again this year thanks to his company’s use of an unpaid child labour force to sell thei...
Rogers Centre unveils new Ted Rogers statue in right field
TORONTO – Ahead of the Blue Jays Home opener, team owner Rogers Inc. unveiled a new statue of Ted Rogers in the right field of the Rogers Centre. “Finally the people will have an in-game opportu...
You WON’T BELIEVE what is going on in North Korea right now
As always, BV+ is here to bring you the truth…...
Jian Ghomeshi announces new podcast that will download to players without your consent
TORONTO – After being acquitted of multiple sexual assault charges last year, disgraced Q host Jian Ghomeshi is getting back into broadcasting with a podcast that your iPhone will download wheth...
Just a heads up that we’re being invited to something called “Passover” this year
By: Aunt Pam Hello again Tompkins clan! It’s your Aunt Pam writing with my bi-monthly family update e-mail and this time I’m making sure everyone is informed about a strange invitation they might be g...
Beleaguered Kendall Jenner launches #kendALLlivesmatter campaign
LOS ANGELES – Facing backlash for her poorly received protest-themed Pepsi commercial, reality tv star Kendall Jenner has created the hashtag #kendALLlivesmatter to raise awareness of her plight...
Whitehorse bylaw officers given light armoured vehicles
WHITEHORSE – The City of Whitehorse has unveiled new light armoured vehicles for its by-law enforcement members as an added safety precaution when dealing with the public. The five new LAV IIIs ...
Man researching meditation really going through something right now
VANCOUVER – The growing obsession of local man, Jeremy Moore surrounding meditation and mindfulness has prompted many to believe that he’s seriously stressed the fuck out. “I knew something was ...
