It’s late at night. A storm rages outside. Thunder booms so loudly you’re starting to think the whole house might collapse. The lights flicker on and off, and the phone rings. You wonder to yourself w...
New Canadian Heritage Minute is surprisingly self-aware
Making parodies about Heritage Minutes. A part of our history since 5 minutes after the first Heritage Minute premiered....
Uberpool replaces tinder as the top app to meet psychopaths
PALO ALTO – A study of Google Play and the App Store indicates that Uberpool has surpassed Tinder, Grindr, and Pokemon Go as the top app to meet local psychopaths. “Uberpool is just so much more...
EDITORIAL: Stop freaking out because I’m waving this loaded gun around, by Maxime Bernier
By Maxime Bernier Can everyone please calm the fuck down? Tabarnak. Look, just because I’m reaching out to Canada’s firearms manufacturers and gun owners to raise money for my leadership bid, doesn’t ...
Canadian Blood Services’ ban on gay blood donors
The Beaverton uncovers the real reason Canadian Blood Services won’t let gay men donate blood....
New STI discovered in Victoria nursing home
Victoria, BC – Health Canada admitted this morning that a new sexually transmitted infection has been discovered in nursing home resident Gladys Newcombe. “This new STI causes terrible pains in ...
5 sexy joke Halloween costumes to spark an evening of ironic intercourse
Halloween. Pumpkins. Candy. Fun parties. And sex you as woman would otherwise feel shame for seeking out. Check out our Halloween guide below to make your perfect costume for trick-or-treating yoursel...
Local woman relieved she can stop meaning to figure out what Vine is
ST. JOHN’S – With the announcement that Twitter will shut down its popular video sharing app Vine, local woman Angela MacIsaac, 31, has expressed relief that she no longer feels obligated to fig...
Report: Everyone at Halloween party wearing Stranger Things costume
FREDERICTON – Reports surfaced early yesterday morning confirming that every single attendee at the office Halloween party was wearing a Stranger Things themed costume. “I mean, we knew it was g...
New ‘Da Vinci Code’ movie highly anticipated among Dan Browns
LOS ANGELES, CA — The Dan Browns of Dan Brown’s Dan Brown Fan Club released an official statement on their website, Saturday, expressing their excitement for Inferno, the new film in the Da Vinc...
