Leonard Cohen: artist, poet, man who has a lot of beefs. With a posthumous poem released this week in which Cohen writes, “Kanye West is not Picasso”, many fans were shocked by Cohen’s saltiness. But ...
Vancouver School Board worried that learning will get in the way of film productions
VANCOUVER – The Vancouver School Board has expressed concerns regarding the safety and productivity of film crews and the negative effects the returning student body will have on them this schoo...
Abortion compromise: Republican feminists fight for right to arm vaginas
WASHINGTON, D.C – Maintaining their pro-life, pro-gun stance, a Republican feminist initiative, is fighting to protect women’s rights by allowing them to arm their vaginas. The “Women’s Right To...
9 cultures you could probably still get away with appropriating this Halloween
While Halloween has always been associated with spooks, candies and adorable children, for many people the best part of Halloween has always been dressing up as stereotypical, ignorant depictions of o...
New condo development just tiny room where foreign investors can store their money
VANCOUVER — Seeking to maximize space and respond to consumer demand, a new condominium development in downtown Vancouver will consist solely of a room where foreign investors can store their mo...
BREAKING: New email reveals your dad is ‘kinda curious about Drag Queens’
VANCOUVER – Based on evidence discovered in a weekly, semi-formal, update email from your aging father, experts believe he may be curious about and in the process of learning more about the subc...
100% of Canada’s Halloween candy suddenly eaten today
OTTAWA – For reasons as yet unknown, the nation has abruptly consumed every last piece of Halloween candy, almost two weeks before trick-or-treating is set to commence, succumbing to an acute, i...
Canada sure all the other countries can tell it’s high
CANADA—Canada has repeatedly confirmed to numerous sources that “everybody else for sure knows” it is “absolutely flying, guys.” The 151-year-old nation, which today legalized the recreational use of ...
Local man willing to do anything that doesn’t affect his daily life to stop climate change
Luke and the Panel (Rebecca Reeds, Craig Fay and Andrew Ivimey) ask the important question: you ever listen to a podcast ON WEED? They talk the media hype over weed legalization (2:00), the vastly dif...
Dozens die in cannabis legalization joke overdoses
OTTAWA – Dozens of Canadians are reportedly dead and thousands of others have been hospitalized after consuming a deadly amount of cannabis-related jokes immediately after pot became legal. Emer...
