CALGARY – Traffic reports from the Morley household indicate that a massive three dog pileup is delaying multiple household commutes. “There’s fur everywhere, and you can still hear barking,” one…
Tag: Featured Post
Sperm banks unfreeze man’s assets
OTTAWA – In response to an ongoing criminal case, Canadian sperm banks have unfrozen accused criminal Charles Grieg’s significant portfolio of assets. Grieg, 47, is facing numerous fraud charges…
“100,000 cases a day totally worth this,” thinks man walking maskless into KFC
Oshawa, ON – Local man Dalton Framer took time to savour the fact that he was finally allowed to walk into a crowded KFC without a mask, regardless of the fact that Ontario is currently fac…
Calgary Police pause order to remove ‘thin blue line’ patch after realizing cops can’t follow simple instructions
CALGARY – The Calgary Police Service has paused an order from the Calgary Police Commission requiring all Calgary cops to remove the ‘thin blue line’ patches from their uniforms after large…
Highlights of the Liberal’s 2022 budget
Amidst a war in Ukraine, high cost of living and the return of Tim Hortons Roll Up The Rim, Finance Minister Chrystia Freeland has tabled the second budget of her tenure. Let’s take a look …
Urban obstacle course installed for men to jump high and touch stuff
TORONTO – City officials cut the ribbon on the Parks Department’s most recent project this weekend; an urban obstacle course where men can jump real high and touch stuff. The course resemb…
Conservative Leadership Candidate Profile: Pierre Poilievre
Background: Poilievre was born wearing a suit, glasses and a sneer. He immediately used his first words to tell the doctor who delivered him everything she had done wrong. He subsequently studied…
New Tesla safety feature requires user retweet Elon Musk to start vehicle
AUSTIN, TX — On the heels of news that Elon Musk had become Twitter’s single largest shareholder, Tesla Motors has unveiled a new safety feature requiring the driver to demonstrate being ca…
April Fools’ post on friend’s social media somehow less fun in era of constant misinformation
Nelson, BC – A lighthearted fib posted on a friend’s Facebook page failed to generate the intended joyful confusion in even one reader this April Fool’s Day in light of the fact that the in…
Thousands of Vancouver perverts delight in taking pictures of tree genitalia
VANCOUVER – Thousands of perverts, creeps, and peeping toms have taken countless photos from different angles of tree genitalia and shared them on social media. Scourges of sexual degenerat…
