Quebec man pretty sure hour-long explanation of Quiet Revolution will convince people he’s not racist

TORONTO – After being called out on charged comments made at a Toronto house party, Gatineau native Jean Tommelier is currently explaining the history of Quebec’s Quiet Revolution in an att…

Andrew Scheer refuses to remove Lynn Beyak from caucus until she says something he doesn’t secretly agree with

OTTAWA – Under pressure to remove controversial Senator Lynn Beyak from the Conservative Caucus, leader of the opposition Andrew Scheer has promised to do so the second Beyak says something…

Donald Trump addresses UN General Assembly with face covered in wing sauce

NEW YORK – US President Donald Trump gave his much anticipated first speech to the United Nations General Assembly Tuesday, and while the speech was historic in content, it will primarily b…

STUDY: Scientists spend 60% of time figuring out whether they could, 20% thinking if they should

Waterloo, ON – A new study by University of Waterloo psychologists has identified how much time scientists devote to figuring out whether or not they could do something, versus if they should do …

Local megalomaniac withholds “like” from Facebook acquaintance

MONTREAL — This past Sunday afternoon, local maniac Sherman Argyle flaunted his mighty influence by refusing to like the photo of a Facebook acquaintance. Reports show that Argyle, drunk with pow…

Masked crimefighter honestly not sure why he thought child sidekick would help

METRO CITY – Costumed adventurer the Crimson Revenger is at a loss to explain why he thought a masked child would be any help in fighting the city’s violent criminal underbelly. The child s…

Time to start talking about Hilary Clinton’s Emails

  BeaverWars explores if it’s time tp finally start talking about Hilary Clinton’s emails.…

Handmaid’s Tale wins Emmy for best documentary

LOS ANGELES – Hulu’s celebrated production of the Handmaid’s Tale won big at the news & documentary Emmy awards last night. Despite tough competition, the show took home the coveted Out…

Guy you played summer hockey with in 2005 has some thoughts on your anti-nazi facebook post

Orangeville, ON – Sources are indicating that Steve, one of the guys who played on a Summer Hockey team with you for three months back in 2005, disagrees with your facebook post condemning …

Woman with rare genetic disorder can only regulate her body temperature by complaining about the heat

VANCOUVER – As temperatures continue to remain high over large sections of Canada, Vancouverite Cheryl McCloud is keeping cool the only way she can: complaining. “It’s not that I enjoy comp…