KINGSTON, ON – Friends of Kaitlin Barr, a 27-year-old neurodivergent copy editor, have recently said their goodbyes after Barr discovered a new hobby, and hyperfixation, of crocheting. “Thi…
Denis Villeneuve apologizes for not giving Bonhomme Carnaval a cameo in Dune: Part Two
HOLLYWOOD – At a recent red carpet interview, Dune: Part Two director and French-Canadian apologized to the province of Quebec for not including a cameo by beloved mascot of the Quebec Wint…
Poilievre says “female spaces” should be reserved for “biological females” and “the men who control them”
OTTAWA – Conservative Party Leader Pierre Poilievre claimed after a question about trans women in sports, that “female spaces” should only be accessed by “biological females” and of course,…
Celebrating 20 years of legalizing same-sex marriage in Ontario: here are 5 of the most boring gay couples
20 years ago, Ontario became the first Canadian province to legalize same-sex marriage, paving the way for the other provinces, and eventually the whole country, to allow gay couples who are as b…
United Kingdom considered powerful nation despite needing 3 days to put hat on old man
LONDON – With King Charles Coronation taking up nearly the entire weekend, many are asking, “if the UK is considered a powerful country, why do they need three whole days to put this hat on…
Woman celebrates 3 hours of socialisation by not leaving apartment for 32 days
GATINEAU, QC – Matilda Hammond, a work-from-home closed-caption writer, caught up with some university pals at a bar for three hours last month, and then rewarded herself by spending the ne…
“Spring in Canada is so beautiful” says woman about to experience months of grimy dirt snow on the side of roads
BURLINGTON, ON – Penny Collier, 31, recently claimed to some international friends that “springtime in Canada is so beautiful”, clearly not remembering the endless months follow…
Lesbian couple grocery shopping not aware their existence is a political statement
KITCHENER, ON – Local lesbian couple Maggie Chaney and Marianne Mathams recently created a sociopolitical stir in a No Frills by engaging in the bold act of being homosexuals out in the wor…
Crying character in movie can’t find perfect wall to slide down
FAKE NEW YORK – Emma Sanford, a character in the recent Netflix romcom Here And/Or There who recently experienced an upsetting breakup, has reported being unable to find the perfect wall to…
Canadians already giving up on 2023, begin planning for 2024 instead
OTTAWA – A recent York University survey indicates that a majority of Canadians have already given up on planning and hoping within the year 2023, and have shifted any optimism forward to t…