PALO ALTO, CA – In a move that shocked business insiders for its generosity and selflessness, Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg and his wife Priscilla Chan have pledged that they will donate near...
Teenage boy summit signs accord for 19% cut to nocturnal emissions by 2030
GENEVA – The Teenage Boy International Summit announced in a communique this morning that an agreement has been reached to cut global nocturnal emissions nearly twenty percent over the next fift...
CBC closes comments on indigenous stories after 4th comments moderator dies from exhaustion
TORONTO—The Canadian Broadcasting Corporation will no longer permit web readers to post comments on any articles involving indigenous peoples just days after the tragic death of a CBC comments moderat...
Swooning world leaders tell Trudeau climate isn’t the only thing that’s hot around here
PARIS — World leaders at the COP21 meeting on climate change have reached a consensus that both the climate and Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau are getting hotter and hotter. An amorous U...
Edmonton Eskimos currently reviewing Washington Redskins PR playbook
EDMONTON — In preparation for their upcoming face-off against Canada’s Inuit community, the Edmonton Eskimos are planning to borrow some public winning over maneuvers from the Washington Redskin...
NRA mourns as USA hit by 338th totally random, unpreventable mass-shooting this year
COLORADO SPRINGS, CO – In a tragedy that no one could have predicted, the USA was rocked yesterday by a random mass-shooting for the 338th time this year. “After the first one this year we were ...
Grey Cup: How players cope with the added pressure from tens of viewers
WINNIPEG — With the outcome of the 103rd Grey Cup between the Edmonton Eskimos and the Ottawa Redblacks far from certain, the pressure on the athletes is compounded by the dozens of viewers that...
Grizzly bear demanding cub back doesn’t seem to understand concept of ‘finders keepers’
WHITE FALLS, B.C. – Making a big old fuss after her cub was taken, one eleven-hundred pound local mother grizzly seems to have forgotten the age-old rule that finders are keepers, and losers are...
KTZ fashion honours Inuit by offering 5% discount on all culturally appropriated fashion
LONDON — UK fashion label KTZ is paying homage to Inuit peoples by offering them a 5% discount on all designer clothing that they have appropriated and sold for profit. KTZ’s creative director M...
Local man against accepting refugees while Canada still has so many unsolved Rubix Cubes
CALGARY – Paul Leslie, a self-described concerned citizen, has claimed that he doesn’t understand how the government justifies the cost of bringing in Syrian refugees when Canada has spent almos...
