NDP: ‘$17/hour’ in English translates to ‘$15/hour’ in French, ‘$13/hour’ in Punjabi

MONTREAL – NDP Leader Thomas Mulcair has informed the media that the wage gap between party campaign workers is just how $17 per hour in English translates differently into French and Punja…

Wright clarifies that Harper’s “good to go” meant he’s “DTF”

OTTAWA – Former PMO chief of staff Nigel Wright testified Wednesday that Stephen Harper’s now-infamous “good to go” email was not an endorsement of Wright’s plan to reimburse suspended Senator Mi…

Diefenbaker cancels Arrow program after discovering aircraft lacks cupholder

An excerpt from The Beaverton Presents Glorious and/or Free: The True History of Canada. Available where books are sold. February 20th, 1959 WINNIPEG – Prime Minister John Diefenbaker has o…

Harper proposes travel ban on Vancouver’s Downtown Eastside

VANCOUVER — Vowing to keep Canadians safe, Prime Minister Stephen Harper promised to criminalize travelling to Vancouver’s notorious East Hasting Street. Harper made the announcement wearin…

Tory travel ban successfully forces extremist to book connecting flight out of Frankfurt

GERMANY – A new initiative by the Tory government seeking to outlaw travel to nations with terrorist activity has successfully forced 27 year-old extremist, Fadi Zubeidi, to book a non-dire…

Harper recommends Netflix doc on missing/murdered Aboriginal women

OTTAWA – Less than a week after pledging to defend Netflix from any form of taxation, Prime Minister Stephen Harper has continued to rave about the many tv shows and movies available on the…

Facebook hosts upcoming election debate between middle school friend, Rick’s uncle

OTTAWA – With the Canadian election period officially begun, Facebook has announced plans to broadcast the upcoming online policy debate between Kaylee, a former friend from middle school, …

Poll: Liberals, Conservatives neck-and-neck among left-handed Yukoners

According to the five person poll, both the Grits and Tories hold 33% of southpaw support with the NDP a distant 17%. “Both leaders have been meeting with the lefty lobby in this riding,”  said F…

87% of Nation’s receptionists agree: Mr. Johannsen not available at the moment

WINNIPEG – A recent country-wide survey of the nation’s receptionists has revealed that 87% of them agree that Mr. Johannson, Vice President of Marketing and Analytics, is not available at …

Harper calls economy a liar during debate

TORONTO — Canada’s system of production and consumption of goods and services was put on the defensive at the Maclean’s National Leaders Debate when Prime Minister Stephen Harper accused it…