LAS VEGAS – Speaking from her residency in Las Vegas, British singer-songwriter Adele has announced the release of a new single all about spending time at the mall, checking out cute boys, and just do...
Local woman waiting to return her missed calls until she’s on crowded bus
OTTAWA – Local woman Marlene Kovach has decided to wait to return all her calls until she can do so in the middle of a bus full of other people. “Sure I could call my mom when I get home,&...
Canadian tradition of giving children hammers at birth pays off
PARIS – The gold medals won this week by Canada’s Ethan Katzberg and Camryn Rogers in the men’s and women’s hammer throw at the 2024 Olympics have been a welcome and unexpected payoff of the lon...
10 more accurate insults for Pierre Poilievre than ‘weird’
In a “let’s just do what our American counterparts are doing but worse’ move that would make even Canadian tv broadcasters jealous, the Liberals are trying to take the weird insult D...
Canadian oil companies bemoan regulations that keep them from being as evil as their US counterparts
OTTAWA – Canada’s top oil producers have issued a joint statement saying government overregulation is keeping the country’s oil industry from having the same negative output as their Unite...
5 tips for celebrating Saskatchewan Day, New Brunswick Day, Natal Day, Briti—wait, Natal Day? What the fuck?
HALIFAX – Another August long weekend is upon us, and whether you’re a Manitoban celebrating Terry Fox Day, a Vancouverite getting ready to enjoy British Columbia Day, or a Nova Scotian ringing in Nat...
Lucky boy in Olympic audience catches shot put
News in Photos...
Embarrassed FIFA announces that Canadians can only use their left feet during quarter-finals
PARIS – After Canada overcame their 6 point deduction during the group stage by going 3-0, Fifa officials have announced that the Canadian women’s soccer team will only be allowed to kick ...
Canada Olympic soccer coaches win gold in “Illegal Drone Spying” event
PARIS – Following the decision by FIFA judges to punish the Canadian women’s soccer organization for illegally surveilling their opponents’ practice, the International Olympic Commit...
