Trump ends government shutdown after realizing unpaid FBI agents can still arrest people
WASHINGTON, DC – President Donald Trump has announced that he is temporarily ending the government shutdown since learning that furloughed FBI agents are still allowed to make arrests. Earl…
Alberta is “Canadian Texas” says man from Canadian Michigan
OSHAWA – While on a third date with a Tinder match, Alex Phillips refers to Alberta as “Canadian Texas,” despite living in Canadian Michigan. “It’s really as backwar…
Blizzard Not Going To Stop Man From Barbecuing Mediocre Steak
Blizzard Not Going To Stop Man From Barbecuing Mediocre Steak Presented by .CA Get your .CA domain name at https://choose.ca…
Modern Day Miracle! This man awoke from a 12 year coma and doctors immediately told him Philip Seymour Hoffman is dead
HAMILTON – It sounds like something from a made for TV movie but this story is completely true! Martin Paulson, a 48 year old who has been in a coma for the past 12 years suddenly awoke in hospit…
Canada’s Ambassador to China John McCallum takes second job as lawyer to Huawei CFO Meng Wanzhou
BEIJING – Canada’s top diplomat in China has been retained as legal counsel for Meng Wanzhou, the Huawei CFO who is currently fighting extradition to the United States on fraud charges. Amb…
Experts predict Black Panther and BlacKkKlansman will lose Best Picture to the one about a white guy who had a black friend once
LOS ANGELES – Following the recent announcement of the nominees for the Academy Awards, entertainment industry experts and Las Vegas oddsmakers agree that Black Panther and BlacKkKlansman a…
Train carrying fresh water derails, contaminating Alberta’s oil sands
FORT MCMURRAY, AB – A freight train carrying over 50,000 litres of fresh water has derailed, devastating several open pit mines and tailing ponds in the Fort McMurray area. No injuries were…
U.S. government shutdown forces border agents to cage children without pay
WASHINGTON, D.C. – The ongoing shutdown of the U.S. government has caused significant financial strain for the nation’s border patrol agents, who still have not been compensated for their v…
Man who sexually harassed coworkers wants everyone to know he sincerely regrets losing his job
CALGARY – A long, bright career ended today following dozens of accusations of sexual harassment against Larry Branson, and he is holding nothing back as he expresses his deep, heartfelt re…
Local man still slipping
OTTAWA – Martin Hendricks, 43, emerged from his house this morning and immediately began slipping on the ice build up on his driveway, only for the process of him falling to go on for an un…
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