HGTV greenlights dream renoviction show

TORONTO, ON- Inspired by the hot renoviction trend in major cities across the nation where tenants are ousted from their apartments under the pretext of improvements, network executives for Home …

“The provincial government will no longer be sued for negligence,” says Ford spinning handgun with safety off

TORONTO – Ontario Premier Doug Ford announced to the media that the province will no longer be liable for misfeasance and negligence making it nearly impossible to sue the government. The a…

Eugene Melnyk spends entire press conference referring to team as “Houston Senators”

KANATA, ON – After a little more than a week after wrapping their 31st-place season, Ottawa Senators owner Eugene Melnyk held what was otherwise a routine press conference today about the t…

Here’s a list of 2019’s must-see concerts that we couldn’t stop our intern Jake from slipping Marxist Rhetoric into

Are you ready for summer? Well we sure are, and to help you make the most of it, we’ve made a list of these mind-blowing acts going on tour, and again, we apologize for our intern Jake’s overzeal…

‘Did you know I’m not drinking alcohol this month?’ says woman to her empty bed

TORONTO – After a long and thoughtful self-care journey, Valerie Duncan has decided to give up drinking this month. A decision she has specifically chosen to disclose to her cold, empty bed…

Scientists confirm Kraft Dinner has never once successfully fed four people

TORONTO – In a startling revelation yesterday, a team of scientists at the University of Toronto released a report providing irrefutable evidence that a single box of Kraft Dinner, contrary to it…

TV viewers wary of upcoming Game of Thrones/This is Us crossover episode

LOS ANGELES – While fans of HBO’s Game of Thrones are eagerly awaiting the upcoming premiere of the show’s eighth and final season, many are expressing concern with the decision to broadcast a la…

Author of novel about dragons insists misogyny was historically accurate

NEW YORK CITY – Robert L. Stonesmith, author of the massively popular fantasy novel “The Fires of Ravensmoor”, took to Twitter yesterday to defend the book’s rampant sexism, stating that hi…

Trudeau always assumed he would be taken down by much sexier scandal

OTTAWA — Following criticism of his decision to oust Jody Wilson-Raybould from the Liberal caucus in the fallout of the SNC-Lavalin affair, Prime Minister Trudeau has replied that he always…

What the hell are YOU looking at?!

By Powehi, the Black Hole…