In the wake of the Bank of Canada’s recent interest rate cut and wide speculation about its impact on inflation, the housing market, and the economy as a whole, overwhelmed experts are now predic…
Lost tribes of Amazon now ordering from Amazon
ENVIRA RIVER, BRAZIL — In a statement yesterday, representatives from the Ashaninka tribe located in a remote region of the Amazon rainforest announced to reporters that they had begun ordering i…
Let’s not jump to conclusions about Jian until we have the facts
BY: BIG EARS TEDDY Friends, fans, Canadians, I, like many of you, was deeply disturbed by allegations made earlier this week against my friend, roommate, and boss Jian Ghomeshi. I, like many of y…
5 Thanksgiving recipes guaranteed to make you forget your disintegrating family
1) Five boxes of wine If you want to take a traditional route, don’t bother with carbs or industrial chemicals, and enjoy the elegant simplicity that is five boxes (or about 120 cups) of w…
Scottish voters say ‘ach ye windie voon dawn’ to independence
EDINBURGH — After years of country-wide debate, and a frenzied campaign that appeared to tighten in the final weeks, the result of Scotland’s independence referendum made a resounding internation…
Local leaves lament frail mortality of poet
CALGARY — This September, as children leave their summer games to return to school, and their parents begin to reluctantly don winter sweaters, the leaves outside the window of local poet Thom Mu…
Margaret Atwood’s latest book, all other books, to remain unread for 100 years
TORONTO – In what is being called an exciting artistic experiment, beloved author Margaret Atwood has released a new work to be placed in a time capsule where it, like the thousands of the …
IMF unveils elite new currency only rich people can use
WASHINGTON — International Monetary Fund Managing director Christine Lagarde yesterday unveiled a new luxury currency that will be used to provide those in the one percent a stable, convenient al…
Report: Stagecoach road trip was a terrible idea
MONTREAL — College friends Steve Bolan, Mark Cho and Doug Guinty reported yesterday after completing a road trip from Toronto to Montreal that taking on 700 kilometres of carefree highway would h…
Local woman still watching True Blood
TORONTO – Despite giving several vague answers on the topic in recent weeks, local woman Anna Trawley, 26, confirmed yesterday that she is “yeah…still probably going to watch the last season of T…
