TORONTO – Members of the federal Liberals are expressing their collective outrage at the recent news that former Prime Minister Brian Mulroney’s daughter, Caroline, will be running as MPP for the Ontario York-Simcoe riding in the upcoming provincial election
“We don’t like to wade into provincial politics but this incident of clear favouritism regarding the child of a former Prime Minister is just too disgusting to go unremarked upon,” said Chrystia Freeland, the Minister of Foreign Affairs, “Have we really sunk to such a shallow level in our politics?”
Criticisms have centred around Caroline Mulroney’s lack of previous political experience and the notion that she would not be given such an opportunity if she did not share a name with a former leader of the country. The Liberals are already pointing out that Mulroney’s position as vice-president of an investment firm isn’t the sort of preparation for elected office that someone with more political experience, or possibly a teacher, would have.
“It’s sick. She’s just a pretty face with good hair and that shouldn’t be enough to elevate anyone to public office,” agreed Ralph Goodale, Minister of Public Safety, “I bet she’ll just spend her whole time taking selfies to try to seem like one of the people!”
Although no allegations have surfaced that the elder Mulroney assisted his daughter to obtain the nomination, the mere association between them appears to be enough in the eyes of many Liberals. Liberal sponsored commercials have already been commissioned casting the decision by the Ontario PCs as “typical of Conservative cronyism and unearned success”.
In response to queries why the Liberals were taking such a firm position on the matter, the Prime Minister’s office remarked: “To paraphrase our fearless leader ‘it’s 2017!’ This sort of thing just shouldn’t be happening anymore!”
“Are we really going to put someone in office simply because we recognize their last name?!” Justin Trudeau stated, shaking his head resignedly.
