OTTAWA – As the re-election of Donald Trump sends shockwaves throughout geopolitics, experts within Ottawa’s Department of National Defence warn that the temperamental US president ma…
Toronto commuter unable to tell if Taylor Swift gridlock has started
TORONTO – Local tax accountant Arthur Nowak has reported being unable to tell whether the city’s long-anticipated influx of Taylor Swift fans has begun, or if this is just regular Thu…
Trudeau suggests now might actually be a great time to retire
OTTAWA – Following the re-election of US President Donald J. Trump, Canadian PM Justin Trudeau immediately suggested that now might be a great time to step down as Liberal party leader and …
Canada turns off all lights in hopes US will think we’re not home
OTTAWA – With Americans voting today to determine the next President of the United States, every single Canadian has announced plans to keep their lights shut off in hopes that they will no…
Local man’s “Dave Chappell Roan” Halloween costume hated by all
HALIFAX – Local Halloween enthusiast Mark Culvers’ latest costume, combining standup comedian Dave Chappelle and indie pop star Chappell Roan, was reportedly universally loathed at a recent…
New Brunswick notifies Blaine Higgs’ parents that his name changing to “ex-premier Blaine Higgs”
FREDERICTON – Today officials with the New Brunswick Government notified the parents of Blaine Higgs, which they are required to do according to Policy 713, to inform them that Higgs name i…
Trudeau promises to rethink Liberal strategy after 5 or 6 more general election losses
OTTAWA – With polls projecting the Liberals to win as few as 53 seats in the next federal election, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has pledged to shake up his party’s campaign strategy follo…
Liberals change rules so more Canadians can buy the shittiest condos ever built
OTTAWA – The Trudeau Liberals have announced relaxing of several mortgage rules, all with the intent of allowing more Canadians to barely afford the crappiest, tiniest investment condos tha…
Rebel News not eligible for journalism tax credits, files with Russian government instead
TORONTO – Following a Canadian Federal Court decision that Rebel News doesn’t qualify for journalism tax credits because it doesn’t produce enough original news content, the far…
