


BUCHAREST, ROMANIA – Notorious manosphere influencer and indicted sex trafficker Andrew Tate announced on his podcast that he will never set foot in Canada, specifically after learning the country broadly disapproves of criminal sex pests.
“Canada is completely fucked, and there’s a negative ten thousand percent chance I’ll ever set foot there in my life,” explained the famed human trafficker on his Tate Speech podcast. “Especially since it turns out those Canucks have all these weird hangups around ‘creeps that sell unsuspecting Eastern European women into sex work’. How backwards can you get?”
The self-proclaimed misogynist and pube-like facial hair enthusiast elaborated, “I bet those maple hosers don’t even like dead-eyed bald goons who traffic minors. That’s why I’m only going to countries where my life’s work is appreciated, like Trump’s America, Putin’s Russia, or the second Epstein Island they didn’t shut down.”
In the meantime, Tate announced plans to remain in Romania until the next time he gets himself arrested by leaving an incriminating pizza box in a livestream shot.
In a related story, all 20.9 million Canadian women have organized a parade to celebrate their nation’s ongoing Tate-Free status.


