SAGUENAY, QC – After topping Spotify’s global charts, the Québécois rock duo Angine de poitrine has reportedly earned enough from the streaming service to pay for the equivalent of “one month of Spotify ad-free.”
For band members Khn (guitarist, long white nose) and Klek (drummer, long black nose), this milestone comes after their song “Fabienk” surpassed ten million streams on Spotify, earning the group a total of $9.55 USD or $13.00 CAD.
“I never thought they’d be able to pay for Spotify with the money they’ve earned from Spotify,” the group’s manager Sébastien Collin, who is some kind of giant puppet or something, told reporters. “But in this day and age, when few people are buying music, it’s so nice to see musicians like Khn and Klek earn a living… and all it took was ten million streams…”
Reached for comment, Khn and Klek said they were happy earning $0.0000001 for every stream, but added how it’s important for them to stay humble.
“We can be all big headed and say this wave of success will last forever, but we know it won’t,” Khn told reporters. Then adding, “In the meantime, Klek and I will carry on making music with the hope we can top the charts again so that we can afford two… maybe three months of Spotify without ads for local dentists.”
Klek went on to say how their success online has even given them opportunities to perform in venues owned and operated by Live Nation, boasting that their manager somehow got them a deal which pays them a dollar for every ten tickets sold.
“That’s like ten million times what Spotify is paying us,” Klek beamed. “And who knows what we’ll do with that money. Maybe we’ll use it towards something like a Netflix subscription, with ads of course, or better yet… maybe we’ll finally be able to get rid of these oversized papier-mache masks and polka dot tunics, and wear comfy Adidas tracksuits like we always wanted.”
Following this record payout, Spotify has reportedly increased the price of their premium plan to $15 CAD, or the equivalent of 20 million streams.
At press time, Quebec officials have confirmed that Angine de poitrine is not, as most have assumed, an elaborate Just For Laughs Gag.
