MENLO PARK, CA – Following a jury decision that found sites like Instagram, Facebook and YouTube to be designed to be purposely addictive to children, the social media giants have been orde…
Tag: google
Google announces plan to shove AI into all its products then eventually remove AI from all its products
MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA – At its annual developer conference, Google has proudly unveiled the numerous AIs it will be forcing into its products until some point in the not-too-distant future when…
As Google threatens to leave Australia, AskJeeves rebrands as “What’s the John Dory, Jeevo”
CANBERRA, AU – As a result of the ongoing dispute between Google and the Australian government over the News Media Bargaining Code, formerly defunct search engine AskJeeves re-emerged on th…
Tired office workers can’t wait to attend mandatory Zoom session on Zoom fatigue
AUGUSTA, ME – Exhausted employees at the Department of Health and Human Services couldn’t be more thrilled about their upcoming compulsory Zoom session on Zoom fatigue. “I am so excited!!!” screa…
Toronto vows to continue gentrification with or without the help of Sidewalk Labs
TORONTO – Citing economic uncertainty, Google affiliate company Sidewalk Labs announced that it is abandoning plans to build a high-tech neighbourhood on the city’s waterfront. However, the…
Man watching porn on incognito mode pretty sure he has everyone fooled
Timmins, ON – Troy Lambert, a cunning rapscallion, believes he has gotten one over on the universe by watching pornography using google chrome’s incognito mode. “Now no one will know that I…
Google admits to installing a phone into its latest personal information gathering device
Mountain View, CA – Google revealed in a press conference today that it has installed a telephone into its latest device for collecting personal information. The conglomerate denies any wro…
New and improved Google calendar now automatically reschedules your dentist appointment eight times
Mountain View, CA – Tech giant Google has unveiled a highly anticipated update to their calendar app, letting it automatically reschedule your dentist appointments so you don’t have to. “Wh…
Google Maps error sends local couple to howling void
HOWLING VOID – Charlaine and Zach Cooper are livid after an error in their Google Maps app caused them to drive straight into the howling void. “You hear about Google accidentally sending p…
Amazon to build second headquarters in Toronto after city accidently subscribes to Prime
TORONTO – Out of 238 contenders, Amazon, Inc. has finally chosen Toronto as the location of its second headquarters, after the city unwittingly subscribed to Amazon Prime. ““We are pleased Toront…
