As we all know, we are in the middle of a singularly unique crisis right now. The world is hurting and needs help. That is why it’s the time for us to quit acting like wimps and fully reopen the …
Tag: Featured Post
“Nothing can harm me now,” states Tim Hortons employee behind flimsy plastic sheet
Scarborough, ON – Local Tim Hortons employee Jim Matthews feels invincible after his management has installed a thin plastic sheet in front of his register. “I’ve never felt so powerful,” s…
“Yes, but so many seniors are still alive,” says Premier Legault
QUEBEC CITY – Quebec Premier François Legault defended his government’s decision to re-open schools, businesses, and private care homes despite the COVID-19 pandemic by pointing out that th…
Quebec suddenly fine with people covering their faces
QUEBEC CITY – As the province re-opens the government of Quebec has decided they’re actually super cool with teachers, civil servants and people accessing government services covering their…
Visiting kids excited to give mom the gift of coronavirus
HAMILTON – Many adult kids blowing off social distancing for Mother’s Day are looking forward to repaying their mothers for 18 years of love and financial support with a potentially deadly diseas…
Justice Department decides doing a crime that you did doesn’t mean you did the crime that you definitely did
WASHINGTON, D.C. – The United States Department of Justice has withdrawn charges against Donald Trump’s former National Security Adviser Michael Flynn. DOJ prosecutors had previously …
Corporations accused of price gouging Northern Communities during the pandemic and also a long time before the pandemic
WHITEHORSE – In the midst of heightened demand during the pandemic some corporations have come under fire for artificially increasing prices, a practice which many spent years perfecting in…
Desperate TSN programmer just gonna start airing his high school hockey games
TORONTO – James Brennan, head of programming for TSN, is so desperate for some kind of sport to show the nation that he is just going to start playing full games of his high school hockey t…
Toronto vows to continue gentrification with or without the help of Sidewalk Labs
TORONTO – Citing economic uncertainty, Google affiliate company Sidewalk Labs announced that it is abandoning plans to build a high-tech neighbourhood on the city’s waterfront. However, the…
But if you take away my assault weapons, I’m just a regular man with hundreds of small guns
By Bobby Stonehouse Not-my-Prime-Minister Justin Trudeau announced last week that Canada would be banning assault weapons, and I, for one, am P’d the F OFF. By doing this, JUSTIN has robbed me of…
