CONNECTICUT – A devastating explosion at Frito-Lays’ Cheetos factory last Thursday – which has left 82 wounded and 27 still missing – was insensitively categorized as a level “d…
Report: Due to shrinkflation, Halloween chip bags now just air
TORONTO – When local man Peter Vidal decided to have “just one bag” of the Halloween chips he purchased for trick-or-treaters, he was shocked to discover that it contained only air. &…
Betrayal: That actor is actually British
ANYWHERE BUT ENGLAND – Viewers of a recent celebrity interview experienced feelings of shock and betrayal upon learning that that new actor is actually British, and not American as they por…
Easter Bunny to bring marshmallow Peeps for naughty kids
Easter Island – The Easter Bunny held a press conference yesterday to announce a radical change to the annual egg hunt tradition. Bunny is adding a moral framework to his delivery system, w…
Extreme home makeover? This man washed his sheets
PORT PERRY – Local man Kyle Thompson surprised friends and family last week with the results of an extreme home makeover that was months – maybe even years – in the making: he washed his be…
6 long winter coats that say “I’m definitely wearing pajamas under here”
Winter is full of small joys – like sipping hot chocolate by the fire, looking at twinkly Christmas lights, and stomping all over snow forts that children spent hours building. But the absolute b…
Devastating: Woman forgets “R” in email to Pedro
PICKERING – Receptionist Kelly Cook shocked coworkers last week after making an unfortunate typo in her email to bookkeeper Pedro Sanchez – she forgot the “r” in Pedro. “…
Toddler more excited to see garbage truck than own father
OSHAWA – Pete Flannigan, father to three-year-old Luca, returned home last night to a crushing realization; his son is more excited to see a vehicle hauling fifteen tons of stinking garbage…
Study: Seasonal depression cured by wrapping paper scissor glides
St. Catharines, ON – In a groundbreaking study by Brock University, researchers have identified the long-awaited cure for seasonal depression: the sweet, sweet satisfaction of gliding a sha…
Cheap dad treats kids to Ripley’s Believe it Or Not! lobby visit
NIAGARA FALLS, ON – While on a recent family vacation, father Todd Evans reached an impressive level of frugality by treating his wife and kids to a visit to the Ripley’s Believe It O…
