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Ultimate April Fools’ prank? Disciples find Christ dead in the tomb
ANCIENT JERUSALEM – The 11 remaining disciples of Jesus Christ were met with a merry prank this April Fools’ morning, after rushing to his tomb to find his body still there and very dead. “…
Barrick Gold entombs fifty foreign miners in Peter Munk’s pyramid so he’ll have workers to abuse in afterlife
TORONTO – Deceased Barrick Gold founder and philanthropist Peter Munk will be laid to rest this week in his family’s pyramid along with fifty still-living miners so he can always have someo…
Parliament Security ask NDP leader Jagmeet Singh to stop putting reserved signs on chairs in the public gallery
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Removing toxic mold from the workplace is PC culture run amok
By ELEANOR THINKPIECE As a straight, cisgender white person, I know my opinion doesn’t count for much these days. But someone has to say it; the current movement to cleanse our workplaces of toxi…
Conservatives find a new use for the barbaric practice of conversion therapy: converting gay men to conservative party voters.
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Vladimir Putin suspected of colluding with Russians to win election
MOSCOW – In a victory speech today, Vladimir Putin staunchly denied any collusion with Russians to aid his campaign, allegations which have cast a dark shadow on his decisive 4th election w…
New Brunswick Tourism Ad
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Known creep posts ‘Happy International Women’s Day’ status on Facebook
MILTON, ON – Presenting a progressive public image, local creep Bruce Jamieson, 28, a man who has a noted history of ignoring consent and sexual misconduct, posted a Facebook status today t…
Proving economists at your uncle’s house right, Ontario’s minimum wage hike has completely destroyed the economy
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