KITCHENER, ON – Laylah Peel, 27, recently realized after a quick text conversation with her father, Arnold Peel, that his company issued Google Pixel must only have the ability to send the …
Tag: iPhone
iPhone battery collapsing from 100% to 1% signals arrival of winter
VANCOUVER – iPhones across the Vancouver area have signaled the beginning of winter by collapsing in battery power when subjected to a temperature below 9 degrees Celsius. “I can’t wait to …
Report: your screen time was down 9% from last week for an average of 14 hours a day
OTTAWA – After spending 16 hours and 15 minutes per day on your phone last week early reports from your iPhone screen time alert indicate that number is down to a marginally less alarming 1…
Commuters warned not to retrieve items dropped on subway tracks unless it’s your phone in which case fair enough
TORONTO — Subway passengers are being warned never to attempt to reach for personal articles that have fallen onto the subway tracks, unless it’s their cell phone because how are you just g…
BREAKING: Phone dead, laptop dead, iPad dead, in tragic technology massacre
MONCTON, NB — Three Apple products were pronounced dead at the scene this morning in what law enforcements are calling, “A technology triple homicide.” “It is difficult for me to comprehend…
Man makes fun of grandmother for plastic-covered couch on phone encased in 2 pounds of rubber
VANCOUVER – Hoping a joke about his grandmother’s twenty year old couch covered in plastic will resonate with his 237 Instagram followers, Kyle Anderson, 24, recently posted about it from h…
Mobile phone game allows users to purchase ability to win
MONTREAL – Mobile game development house Kyoho Games has announced that their new free downloadable release – Block Exploder – allows players the option to pay a small premium f…
Lonely woman relieved to know at least her phone is listening
HAMILTON, ON – After what felt like years of being invisible to the rest of the world, local lonely woman Nancy Opham was relieved to discover this week that her phone has been listening to…
Update: Parent who made half-assed attempt to discipline child has gone back to looking at their phone
PICKERING, ON – In an update to an earlier situation, local parent Sandra MacLean has returned to experimenting with filters on her phone after making a half-hearted attempt at disciplining…
iPhone X comes with pre-cracked screen, 89 group text-notifications
CUPERTINO, CA – After waiting months for the release of the iPhone X, Apple fans were pleased to discover new features that the new technology comes loaded with, including a pre-cracked scr…