TORONTO – Following a commanding re-election victory by incumbent mayor Olivia Chow, second place candidate Brad Bradford is announcing that he no longer wants to be the next mayor of Toron…
Tag: mayor
Brad Bradford vows to put a cop in your living room if elected Mayor
Toronto, ON – In a bold campaign move, Toronto mayoral hopeful Brad Bradford has vowed to put a police officer in your living room if elected to office. “You will never have to worry about your …
Brad Bradford reinvigorates campaign with desperate “Landlords need more” slogan
Toronto, ON – Alliterative city councillor Brad Bradford ‘the rad landlord’ has relaunched his campy campaign for major mayor of Toronto with the desperate new slogan, “Landlords need…
Desperate Brad Bradford adds another Brad to his name
TORONTO – Election day in Toronto is fast approaching, and polls continue to show Mayor Olivia Chow with a lead over challenger Brad Bradford. So, in a desperate effort to court the bland, middle…
Doug Ford clarifies Strong Mayors are the ones that can lift him
QUEEN’S PARK – Ontario Premier Doug Ford has expanded on the “strong mayor” powers he gave certain municipalities earlier this year, stating they only apply to mayors who …
Mayor-elect Olivia Chow currently riding bike to go do donuts on Doug Ford’s lawn
TORONTO – Following her victory in last night’s citywide election, mayor elect Olivia Chow has announced that her first order of business will be to ride her bike directly to Etobicok…
Quiz: Who should you vote for in Toronto’s Mayoral Race
It’s sex scandal caused election day in Toronto! The city is ready to move on from legendary horn dog John Tory and install a new Strong Mayor. But which of the 500 candidates deserves your…
John Tory admits to fucking Toronto
TORONTO – In breaking news, Mayor John Tory has announced his resignation after admitting to fucking Toronto. “It was a serious error of judgment on my part,” the longtime polit…
This Brad J. Lamb condo development sign is running for Mayor of Toronto
TORONTO – In the lead up to the October 22 municipal election, it looks like incumbent Mayor John Tory will have a new opponent to face: this Brad J. Lamb Condo Development Notice Sign. The…
Doug Ford won’t stop taping ‘Mayor Of Toronto’ sign on office door
TORONTO – Despite being removed every night by janitorial staff, Doug Ford continues to tape a handwritten sign on his office door that reads ‘Mayor of Toronto.’ “At first I thought it was …
