by Jameson Varner, CEO I’m the CEO of a major accounting firm, which means I have my finger on the market’s pulse. Both financial and tech journalists have been predicting that artifi…
Tag: artificial intelligence
Nestlé worried AI will destroy world’s water supply before they do
VEVEY, SWITZERLAND – Nestlé executives gathered from around the world to announce their grave concern regarding the impact that artificial intelligence’s water consumption will have on thei…
“AI is not a threat” says man threatened by vibrators
BURNABY, B.C. – A local man exceedingly wary of vibrators also insists that artificial intelligence is not a threat. “AI is just one tool in our toolkit,” says Tyler Bowman, 31, who has never suc…
Tech CEOs suggest AI job losses could be offset by UBI which they will violently oppose
PALO ALTO, CA – A group of Silicon Valley tech CEOs assure North Americans that job losses from artificial intelligence could easily be mitigated by universal basic income, while also addin…
Carney introduces bail reform mostly just to see the look on Poilievre’s face
“Poilievre’s bill is called ‘Jail Not Bail’, but it should be something cooled like ‘Pris Not Rizz’.” We discuss the most exciting news on every Canadian…
Creators of AI-generated actress unsure if coolest part is the creepiness or the stealing
PALO ALTO, CA – The inventors of Tilly Norwood, a computer generated character built using artificial intelligence, enthusiastically insist their creation is both unsettlingly lifeless and …
“AI is just a tool” says tech mogul who is just a tool
PALO ALTO, CA – Tech industry billionaire Jared Banks recently dismissed fears over artificial intelligence disrupting the labor market by insisting that AI is “just a tool”, wh…
Billionaire with doomsday bunker wants you to know AI great
PALO ALTO, CA – Artificial intelligence promises a bright future filled with ease, innovation and abundance, according to one of the several billionaire tech CEOs who has spent hundreds of …
ChatGPT user delighted to combine sloth with theft
WATERLOO, ON – A local self-published “author”, Chaz Wolverton, 25, is extolling the brighter side of plagiarism engines like ChatGPT and Grok. “I’ve always been jealous of the glory…
Guy who can’t find the clitoris really into AI art
VICTORIA, BC – A local man who has never once found a woman’s clitoris has really gotten into AI art. “AI is the best,” claimed Shawn Owens, 29, as he played a video game created by real human be…
