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OTTAWA – Health Canada will release a series of television commercials warning Canadians about the dangers of voting for the Liberal Party. Anchor: Aaron Hagey-Mackay Sound Effect: Mansardi…
Harper visits Arctic to discuss Northern photo development
IQALUIT – After a long flight from Ottawa, Prime Minister Stephen Harper arrived in the North earlier this week to sit down and discuss with Northern leaders and communities on the progress…
Local man sitting by bucket of ice, just waiting to be challenged
ST. JOHN – Jason Travers, 29, has become so taken by the Ice Bucket Challenge to raise awareness and funds for ALS research, that he is currently sitting in his backyard with a large bucket…
Feds cite ‘Lazy River Ride’ as evidence that waterways are lazy, undeserving of protection
VAUGHAN — After a weekend spent at Splash Works with his family, Conservative MP Peter Kent resolved to remove all remaining protections enjoyed by Canada’s rivers, citing the Lazy River R…
Your monthly horoscope: August 2014
Capricorn (December 22 – January 19) Thinking about starting a family? Remember, having children requires a sense of optimism about humanity that you haven’t possessed since childhood…
COUNTERPOINT: I thought I was Minister of Veteran Affairs, not Minister of Crybaby Affairs
BY: HON JULIAN FANTINO, MINISTER OF VETERAN AFFAIRS It is critical to provide veterans with the facts about the benefits and services that are available to them so they may get the help they need…
Israel urges US to pull troops out of Ferguson
WASHINGTON – Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu has urged the United States to pull their troops out of Ferguson, criticizing the military occupation as “an inhumane and unnecessary …
Local abyss tired of getting stared at by creepy philosophers
BURLINGTON, ON – An infinitely dark and enigmatic vortex of existential dread has had enough of being watched and accosted by prominent sages and thinkers. “They all give me this deer-in-th…
Montreal municipal workers grant themselves permit to burn city hall
MONTREAL – Municipal workers in Montreal protesting the province’s pension reform have granted themselves permission to burn down the city’s famed l’Hotel de ville as well as several other …