HAMILTON, ON – After a scuffle and screaming match in Hamilton yesterday, community leaders have asked local political demonstrators to reserve their hate and transgressions for a Tiger-Cat…
Ontario
Ford lives out childhood dream of firing teachers over his summer vacation
TORONTO – Ontario Premier Doug Ford and the Progressive Conservatives played out their school-yard fantasy today, by firing taking 10,000 teaching jobs away from the education system by 202…
Doug Ford vows to reach $15 billion deficit total he lied about before the end of his term
QUEEN’S PARK – During his 2018 election campaign, Ford claimed the Liberals had left him with a $15 billion deficit, now understood to be a much smaller sum of $7.8 billion, and has since promise…
Snapping turtle keeps Greenbelt home after donating $100,000 to Ontario PCs
UXBRIDGE, ON – A wealthy snapping turtle from the Oak Ridges Moraine Conservation Area has successfully lobbied to keep her home after making a generous donation on the Ontario Progressive …
Ontario government replaces OSAP with Taylor Swift
TORONTO – After superstar Taylor Swift made a generous donation to support a fan’s tuition fees, the Ontario government has announced that the American singer-songwriter will now be the onl…
Report: Ford tried to obtain neuralyzer to make people forget past year
TORONTO – A recent Freedom of Information request has revealed Ontario Premier Doug Ford has attempted to obtain a neuralyzer like the one featured in the Men in Black film series. Accordin…
Doug Ford to privatize birds
TORONTO — This week, Premier Doug Ford announced a bold plan to privatize birds in the province of Ontario. “We’ve been wasting money on public birds for too long,” said Ford. “We simply ca…
New VQA Ontario labelling requires $1,000 donation to Ontario PCs to verify authentic corruption
PELEE ISLAND, ON – In accordance with the new rules mandated by the provincial government, Ontario’s wines will now be required to make a $1,000 donation to the Ontario PC Party to receive …
Simu Liu breaks barriers as first Mississaugan superhero
SAN DIEGO — Marvel Studios has announced that Chinese-Canadian actor Simu Liu, of Kim’s Convenience, will play the lead in their upcoming film Shang Chi, making this their first film to fea…
Ontario Minister Lisa MacLeod apologizes to Senators owner for outburst after mistaking him for parent of child with autism
OTTAWA – Ontario Minister of Tourism, Culture, and Sport Lisa MacLeod has apologized to Ottawa Senators owner Eugene Melnyk for mistaking him for any parent of a child with autism. “I apolo…
