“The fact that our festival runs the exact same length of time as their house arrest sentence is mere coincidence, we assure you.” Luke and the Panel (Ian MacIntyre, Megan MacKay and …
Breaking: so it is possible for a homegrown star to succeed in playoffs despite Toronto fans, media
TORONTO – Vladimir Guerrero Jr. has led the Blue Jays to a 2-0 series lead over the New York Yankees, proving that it actually is possible for a Toronto athlete to perform well in the playo…
“I know it’s only the Preseason but…” says hockey fan about to make the dumbest prediction of all time
TORONTO – As the pre-season winds down hockey fans are using the preamble “I know it’s only the preseason but” to unleash their wildest and dumbest takes. “I know it…
Trump promises shutdown will not impact essential U.S. government services like Bombings and Coups
“Don’t worry, we still have enough funds to indiscriminately bomb people on small boats near the coast of Venezuela.” Luke and the Panel (Nile Seguin, Clare Blackwood, Megan Mac…
Liberals respond to claim their new crime bill will criminalize legitimate protest: “Yup, that’s the idea.”
“You nailed it man. Way to figure it out!” Luke and the Panel (Ian MacIntyre, Megan MacKay and special guest Brandon Hackett) talk about Jimmy Kimmel’s absurd suspension, wonder…
“Charlie Kirk would have wanted us to get anyone criticizing his views fired,” says man accurately describing why Charlie Kirk deserved criticism
“The guy who created a list of left-wing college professors he wanted fired for their views would want us to fire anyone who pointed out who he created a to be fired list.” Luke and t…
Person you forgot was Ontario Liberal Party leader no longer Ontario Liberal Party leader
TORONTO – Bonnie Crombee (sp?), the person who has apparently been head of the Liberal Party of Ontario since 2023, is reportedly not doing that anymore. “Despite getting over 50% sup…
Visibly trembling Oilers fan insists he’s not worried about McDavid contract situation
EDMONTON – With training camp about a week away and no sign of Connor McDavid signing an extension anytime soon, Oilers fan and visibly shaking from head to toe human being Malcolm Serrano …
Everything you need to know about Alberta’s book ban
1. According to Danielle Smith it’s not a book ban, just an order banning certain books 2. The order written in July by Education Minister Demetrios Nicolaides contained such explicit descr…
Raccoon standing still on top of garbage bin worried he’s not going to get to scare the fuck out of anyone tonight
TORONTO – A local raccoon that has been standing perfectly still on top of a garbage can next to a house in Toronto’s Beach neighbourhood for 3 hours now, is starting to get worried h…
