TORONTO – ‘Occupy Toronto’ protesters are celebrating their media gains over ‘Occupy Wall Street’ this week.
“People didn’t think we had it in us,” said Alek Brondowin, a protester. “But slowly we are convincing the world that Canada suffers from serious, crisis-level problems, just like the US. Even if we don’t.”
Regarding Canada’s high standard of living, Brondowin added, “It hasn’t been an easy road to draw attention away from robust social programs, universal health care, and generous tax benefits, but our persistence has paid off.”
William Peterson, an executive at Bank of America, offered a heartfelt thanks to Occupy Toronto protesters for their ongoing efforts.
“It’s good to know we can count on the people of Canada to provide a welcome distraction from consequential news in the U.S. By comparing their stable, well-regulated economy to ours, they have helped make the Occupy Wall Street movement appear somewhat foolish.”
Toronto has an illustrious history in the global community of comparing their moderate problems to world events of greater importance.
“They take their role as an uninteresting nation very seriously,” Peterson said. “I especially appreciate their efforts in sports. Sometimes when the playoffs get intense, The Maple Leafs are a welcome distraction from real hockey teams.”
