SASKATOON, SK – The entire nation of Canada took to its feet this week to deliver a standing ovation as Gordie Howe, better known as ‘Mr. Hockey,’ made his final trip to the box.
Howe was assessed five, ten, and an eternity after delivering a hard-fought, elegantly lived life that saw him score more than 800 goals, raise four children with the love of his life, Colleen, and devote himself tirelessly to various charitable endeavours – a feat better known as “the real Gordie Howe hat trick.”
Once Howe’s spirit gets out of the box, he’ll join linemates Ted Lindsay and Sid Abel on Heaven’s top line, bringing an unparalleled mixture of size, speed, skill, and grit to an already stacked lineup. Upon learning of Howe’s addition to Team Heaven, Satan, head coach of arch-rival Team Hell, freely admitted to shitting his pants.
Team Heaven assistant coach Laurent Noonan describes Howe as “great in the room,” adding that his teammates have already begun dumping pucks deep into the corners, knowing that any opponent who goes in there with Howe, isn’t coming back.
