VANCOUVER — Local barista Rob McNair smashed thirty-eight fellow transit riders with his backpack earlier today while acting on unconscious instincts from his previous incarnation as a soldier in…
Tag: transit
Toronto man who moved to Ottawa feeling right at home after seeing how shit their transit system is
OTTAWA – Born and raised Toronto man Kyle Chilton was nervous about moving to Ottawa when his job relocated, but says he is starting to feel at home after getting a good look at the broken …
“Probs just urine,” says woman who sat in wet seat on bus
VANCOUVER, BC – On her commute to work, 30-year-old mother and elementary school teacher, Mya Diaz, sat in a wet seat on her B-Line bus, but reassured herself that the mysterious fluid was …
Heartwarming: this TTC ad shows 100 years worth of TTC delays
TORONTO – The TTC have launched a nostalgic campaign in Toronto to celebrate their centennial year by featuring 100 years worth of TTC delays. “Having carried more than 31 billion customers…
CN Rail installs speed bumps to curb speeding trains
MONTREAL – In a press release published today CN Rail announced plans to warp sections of train tracks into speed bumps to maintain Canada’s status as a leader in slow-speed rail transit. “…
TTC to replace shuttle buses with being pushed off cliff in barrel full of eels
TORONTO – The Toronto Transit Commission announced plans today to replace their unpopular shuttle bus system with thousands of barrels stuffed with wriggling carnivorous fish. Officials promise t…
Angry tweet at TTC fixes decades of underfunding
TORONTO, ON — After a twitter user wrote “@TTCHelps 8 minute wait for the subway, why do MY tax dollars go towards such a lazy incompetent organization?”, years of problems caused by …
Man who brought TTC into the 20th century resigns
TORONTO – Addressing a crowd of reporters, Andy Byford, the man who worked tirelessly for the last five years to bring the Toronto Transit Commission into the twentieth century made public …
Quiz: You think you’re better than me?!
I saw you giving me the eye from across the subway car! Yeah, I’m talking to you Mr. plaid shirt and blue jeans! Something about me amuses you or something? Take this simple quiz to find out if y…
Thunder Bay transit opens single subway station
THUNDER BAY, ON – Transit advocates and city residents celebrated the grand opening of the city of Thunder Bay’s first and only subway station today, located on Memorial Ave. near the Inter…