OTTAWA – Continuing with their vision of the utopia Canada will be if they are elected, the Conservatives have announced that, within weeks of them taking over government, your life will ba…
Tag: CPC
Conservatives announce new campaign slogan: “You Think You’re Better Than Me?!”
OTTAWA – The Conservative Party of Canada announced its campaign slogan for the next election will be “You think you’re better than me?!” “Nothing encapsulates the c…
10 most controversial policies passed at the Conservative Party convention
At their annual party convention this past weekend the Conservative base attempted to defuse Liberal arguments that the party is too far to the right for the average Canadian voter by passing a b…
PPC struggle to adapt to Poilievre’s popularity with their base: men who keep a list of every woman that’s rejected them
OTTAWA – The People’s Party Of Canada are struggling to adapt to Pierre Poilievre’s ascension to Conservative Party leader given his popularity with the men who make up the part…
Conservatives warn Liberal-NDP deal is “backdoor socialism”, “handjob democracy” and “salad-tossing representation”
OTTAWA – Following the announcement of a plan for the NDP to support Justin Trudeau’s Liberal government until 2025, Conservative MPs ar warning the deal will surely lead to “backdoor socia…
Quiz: Which Conservative leadership candidate are you, and why is it Pierre Poilievre you sick fuck?
The race to see who will succeed Erin O’Toole as ‘Prime Minister In Waiting For The Liberals To Do Another Scandal’ is on! And there are so many characters involved, from fun 90…
Conservative Party announces this the best they could do
OTTAWA – In an announcement over Zoom from its headquarters, the Conservative Party of Canada revealed after a months-long campaign, that this, this, is the best the party has to offer. “Lo…
Conservative Party demands knowledge back from Scheer’s kids
OTTAWA – The Conservative Party has announced that following Andrew Scheer’s resignation as party leader, they will also be expecting to recoup the knowledge his kids acquired while attendi…
Conservative platform promises to only cut 2 provinces
OTTAWA — With Andrew Scheer’s Conservatives finally releasing their electoral platform, the plan has promised to cut “no more than 2 Canadian provinces”. The CPC platform, released last Fri…
Andrew Scheer still hoping someone about to throw him surprise belated birthday party
OTTAWA – Andrew Scheer appeared distracted during a caucus meeting today, as sources say the Federal Conservative Leader was clearly expecting some kind of belated surprise party to celebr…