The Beaverton

China loans Canada two giant pandas

In what is being described as ‘Panda diplomacy,’ The People’s Republic of China has agreed to loan Canada two giant pandas – at a cost of $10 million – as a symbol of goodwill and the…


Renegade stock clerk has big plans for aisle three

PEMBROKE, ON – Loblaws stock clerk Jeremy Brenton was quite vocal this morning with both customers and passersby regarding his “huge plans” for the store’s Aisle Three. Brenton was overheard mumb…


Master farter confused by constant rejection

MILTON, ON – Gifted tooter Josh Bibby expressed displeasure today at his inability to find a “nice girl,” despite his painstakingly-honed ability to fart on command. “I’ve tried online dati…


Subscribe to Our Newsletter