Brad Bradford reinvigorates campaign with desperate “Landlords need more” slogan
Toronto, ON – Alliterative city councillor Brad Bradford ‘the rad landlord’ has relaunched his campy campaign for major mayor of Toronto with the desperate new slogan, “Landlords need…
U.S. government accuses Canada of meddling in Alberta referendum
WASHINGTON, D. C. – Secretary of State Marco Rubio is reportedly accusing Prime Minister Mark Carney of election interference in the recent Alberta referendum. The accusation came after Prime Min…
Nation shocked as Alberta makes good decision
EDMONTON – With 76% of Albertans voting to reject a referendum on leaving Canada, the remainder of Canadians have registered “pleasant shock” at the province’s decision to…
Alberta Separatists confident of victory due to “Canadians’ overwhelming love for USA and Trump”
CALGARY – Despite Alberta separatism polling at under 30%, separatist organizers are confident they have read the electorate correctly, pointing to “the current record-high levels of …
AI coworker put on 90-day Performance Improvement Plan
TORONTO – HubRate Insurance confirmed that Agentic Representative Chad, its first AI agent, who was hired to revolutionize throughput and eliminate bottlenecks, has been formally placed on …
Trump, Musk clash over who deserves more credit for betraying Ukraine
WASHINGTON D.C. – President Donald Trump and SpaceX CEO Elon Musk are reportedly feuding once again as each demands full accolades for giving the order to throttle Starlink usage for Ukrain…
New study shows link between cars and traffic
OXFORD, UK – A new study from the International School of Roads has reportedly uncovered the root cause of traffic on roads and major highways worldwide: four-wheeled vehicles known as “cars.” Th…
7 most shocking revelations from Chrystia Freeland’s Unreliable Boyfriend
TORONTO – With the publication of Unreliable Boyfriend, Chrystia Freeland’s account of her years in former Prime Minister Justin Trudeau’s cabinet, the former Finance Minister has revealed …
Report: video of Quebecois kid singing still delightful on 78th viewing
“Like any great work of art, there are details you only pick up on after repeated viewings.” Luke and the Panel (Ian MacIntyre, Clare Blackwood and Nile Seguin) talk about Trump’…
Ambassador Hoekstra warns Canadians not to meddle in midterms but also to accept blame for costing Republicans the midterms
OTTAWA – U.S. Ambassador to Canada Pete Hoekstra says American officials are warning Canadians not to interfere in the upcoming U.S. midterm elections, while also ordering them to prepare t…
