Fairfax, NFLD – Feather Feet, formerly Fairfax Footwear, has recalled their first famed flip-flop franchise, the Freezy Flow, for flipping, but failing to flop. Faulty manufacturing on the …
Business
Worker bees unionize
MEDICINE HAT, AB – For the first time in apiary history, worker bees are organizing to stand up for their basic rights. “People think bees don’t need to sleep,” said Worker Bee #458909. “We…
CBC sends Justin Trudeau holiday gift basket complete with artisanal CBC donation box
OTTAWA – In the spirit of the season, Prime Minister Trudeau has received a gift basket from the CBC filled with shortbread cookies, dried fruits, and a beautifully hand-carved donation box…
LCBO website hacked by Anonymous Alcoholics
TORONTO – The website of the Liquor Control Board of Ontario, North America’s largest distributor of liquor and wine, was hacked last night by the notorious online group Anonymous Alcoholic…
New workplace stress training empowers employees to blame selves
Newmarket, ON — A new workplace stress management course at office supply distributor Nanco Dynamics will help ensure employees take responsibility for their stress rather than blaming a dy…
Mark Zuckerberg to donate 99% of your personal information to charity
PALO ALTO, CA – In a move that shocked business insiders for its generosity and selflessness, Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg and his wife Priscilla Chan have pledged that they will donate…
Amazon.com mails out 260,000 page home shopping catalog
NORTH AMERICA – Just in time for the holiday season, online retailer Amazon.com has released its annual catalog of the products available on its website, a convenient tool for home shoppers…
Domino’s Pizza introduces new ‘30 minutes or it’s probably not coming’ promotion
ANN ARBOR – In a move that has stunned the fast food industry, Domino’s Pizza has unveiled a new delivery policy for its customers: Your pizza delivered in 30 minutes or it’s probably not coming …
Starbucks marks Remembrance Day by remembering Christmas is seven weeks away
CLARINGTON, ON — Starbucks locations from across Canada are marking November 11th by festively reminding customers that the Holidays are only a mere seven weeks away. “We are honouring our …
