London, ON – Local woman Mona Tucker is still reeling from the discovery of a long-lost family photo album from 1973 that revealed that her mother, Amy, was a fun, popular recreational coke…
Tag: Mother’s Day
Mothers gather for annual Festival of Secretly Ripping on Gifts
PARTS UNKNOWN – Mothers worldwide have covertly gathered together for their annual tradition of secretly mocking the gifts they received for Mother’s Day. The ceremony begins with the light…
Report: Oh fuck, Mother’s Day!
OTTAWA—Scientists released a report today indicating that shit! It’s Mother’s Day! Fuck, what time is it? Authors of the report further stated that goddamn it, Mom’s probably already in bed by no…
Local Mother’s Day ruined by Freudian Slip
SASKATOON, SK – Witnesses report that local businessman, Jared Rice, has made Mother’s Day intolerably awkward for everyone around him after he accidentally introduced his mother, Ruth, as …
Local mom already teary-eyed full week before Mother’s Day
SASKATOON – Debra McIntosh, a local mother, is barely holding back tears of happiness after she remembered that her husband and children will be celebrating Mother’s Day in a week. “Just th…
All new mom wants for Mother’s Day is an IUD
TORONTO – New mother Megan Hill knows what she wants from her babies this mother’s day, and that’s the promise she will never have another baby ever again. “When I got pregnant with our twins Vio…
Local mom spends Mother’s Day hoping son forgets to call
REGINA, SK – Greeting card writer and longtime mother, Cindy Watros, spent much of her Mother’s Day, the annual event in which children express gratitude for all their mothers have done for…