San Francisco, CA – Elon Musk has reportedly been waiting outside Mark Zuckerberg’s San Francisco residence until he leaves his house so he can knock on his door and run. “I’m setting up an…
Tag: Mark Zuckerberg
Read our letter threatening to sue Mark Zuckerberg
Meta was stopping people from seeing our content so we took action…
BREAKING: Mark Zuckerberg discovered dead in midst of squirrel orgy and you know this is from a real news source since it’s being blocked on Meta
MENLO PARK – The Beaverton has just confirmed that the body of billionaire Mark Zuckerberg has just been discovered in a pile of thousands of writhing, mating squirrels. The chairman and CE…
Tech Update: Mom’s Already Posted Her SIN on Threads
Can you friggin believe it? Threads, Meta’s answer to Twitter, has been around for literally 24 hours, and Mom has already posted her SIN on it. ALREADY. The annoying thread in question was poste…
Zuckerberg banishes 11,000 workers to the Metaverse
MENLO PARK, CA – After disappointing results in the latest quarter, Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg sent out a notice to his workforce that the company is expelling 11,000 employees from corporeal…
“Zuckerberg has too much power” says billionaire who vacations in space
VANCOUVER – Noted space vacationer and inventor of the world’s doucheiest car Elon Musk publicly criticized Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg for holding too much social and political influe…
April Fools’ post on friend’s social media somehow less fun in era of constant misinformation
Nelson, BC – A lighthearted fib posted on a friend’s Facebook page failed to generate the intended joyful confusion in even one reader this April Fool’s Day in light of the fact that the in…
Cutting edge Facebook app lets you attend VR-meetings that should’ve been e-mails
MENLO PARK, CA – Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg has announced the release of Horizon Workrooms, an ultra-high-tech solution to the age-old problem of your boss needing to find new and expensi…
Facebook responds to antitrust lawsuits with acquisition of Justice Department
MENLO PARK, CA – In response to twin antitrust lawsuits launched by dozens of states and the federal government, social media giant Facebook has purchased the United States Justice Departme…
Police seek public’s help identifying looters
American authorities are asking for the public’s help in a nationwide manhunt for two men caught on camera looting during a time of emergency. Witnesses say the men pictured took advantage of a h…