CORNWALL, ON – Jacob Ryland, 4th grader at Rose Elementary, got the best news of his life at 1:48PM last Wednesday when he was asked to pack up his things and go to the office to meet his m…
Tag: kid
Single drop of sweat falls down local dad’s face as he tells daycare worker his child doesn’t have runny nose
TORONTO – As local father Jalen Hart told the worker asking COVID checklist questions at the front entrance of the Little Tot’s Playhouse daycare that his child Marcus did not have a …
STUDY: Uncle still believes thing you liked when you were 3 represents your whole personality
DRUMMONDVILLE, QC – According to a detailed study of birthday cards received and samples of holiday dinner smalltalk, analysts are reporting that your uncle Victor has not made any updates …
Homeschooled child not looking forward to going back-to-home
LETHBRIDGE, AB – Dreading the end of summer vacation, a local homeschooled child reported that she’s not looking forward to going back to her own house and starting grade 5. Rachel Moore, 1…
I’m pretty sure that crossing guard thinks I’m a kid
By: David Hester, 33. Does that crossing guard think I’m a kid? We definitely made eye contact when I was waiting for the walk signal at an intersection I would describe as “not worthy of concern…
6-year-old awakens from sugar-crash covered in temporary tattoos
GATINEAU, QC – After slowly coming to from a sugar-crash-induced nap, 6-year-old Phillippe Watkins was surprised to discover his body covered in temporary Cars 3 tattoos that he had no memo…
Kid not allowed to eat candy reports apples ‘fun snack’
TORONTO- Biting into cut up pieces of honeycrisp prepared by his health conscious parents, local six year old, Thurman Jackson, made news this week after officially declaring apples a “fun snack.…
6 money management tips from a toddler who just bought five Kinder Eggs
Hi! I am rich! I have five Kinder Eggs that I brought from the store. Do you want to know how to get enough money to buy fiveKinder Eggs? This is the most Kinder Eggs I have ever seen! I have a l…
Quiz: Which criminally negligent human on ‘Paw Patrol’ are you?
If you’re a three-year-old, then you know Paw Patrol is a morning cartoon about six delightful puppies heroically protecting the good citizens of Adventure Bay. If you’re the parent of a three-ye…