April Fools’ post on friend’s social media somehow less fun in era of constant misinformation

Nelson, BC – A lighthearted fib posted on a friend’s Facebook page failed to generate the intended joyful confusion in even one reader this April Fool’s Day in light of the fact that the in…

Man in Fred Perry polo clarifies he’s still an asshole but just not in that way

MONTREAL – After being the subject of numerous side glances and hushed whispers, local man in a Fred Perry polo Travis McCauley has come forward to clarify he’s still an asshole but just no…

Thousands of Vancouver perverts delight in taking pictures of tree genitalia

VANCOUVER – Thousands of perverts, creeps, and peeping toms have taken countless photos from different angles of tree genitalia and shared them on social media. Scourges of sexual degenerat…

Ontario Conservatives pass law banning people from posting positive COVID tests on social media

TORONTO – As part of their ‘don’t say anything about a 6th wave or we’ll cut you’ approach to managing COVID, Doug Ford and the Conservatives announced a full ban on…

Plastic bag added to bag of plastic bags destined to one day be added to larger bag of plastic bags

CALGARY – According to sources in the Ross household, a plastic bag from this morning’s outing to the grocery store has been stuffed into a larger plastic bag full of plastic bags. “I should real…

Liberals announce plans to continue announcing plans to, one day, cut emission rates

OTTAWA – Justin Trudeau’s Liberals have announced their latest announcement to announce that at some point they will actually announce how they will cut Canada’s emission rates.…

Opinion: this hockey game would be so much better if they just kissed already

By: Chad “The Bear” Powell Oh man! This hockey game is the best thing ever! Goals! Hotdogs! Sitting in the stands cheering! AW SHIT! Are you seeing that? Those all stars are brawling like animals…

Hybrid work model feels more like an indica

BURLINGTON — Following the introduction of a back-to-work schedule that requires staff to be in the office three days a week, employees at local startup Spinjack Digital say the new hybrid model …

Poilievre counters “obnoxious nerd” image by revealing he’s into bitcoin

OTTAWA – In order to combat his well-known public image as an “insufferable know-it-all geek”, Conservative leadership hopeful Pierre Poilievre has revealed that he is also very into crypto…

Conservatives say Trudeau will be defeated like all other dictators: in an election

OTTAWA – Having repeatedly called PM Justin Trudeau a dictator comparable to Vladimir Putin, the Conservative Party is vowing to stop him the same way freedom loving people have stopped all…