Martha Stortz, Author at The Beaverton

Feminism Win! This Sex Doll has a mouth

In a man’s world, it can be hard to find a win :(. But this #feminist just got a little cheerier because see this sex doll right here? This silicone woman-shaped 46-14-36 vessel for Dick Dannon? …


Burger King invokes prima nocta

MIAMI, FL – In a stunning turn of events late yesterday, his Royal Highness the Burger King publicly announced his invocation of the ancient doctrine of prima nocta. For the uninitiated, pr…


Prince Philip named Sexiest Man Kinda Alive

LONDON- Hot on the heels of Prince William’s recognition as the World’s Sexiest Bald Man, The Duke of Edinburgh Prince Philip was recently named the Sexiest Man Kinda Alive. In the poll conducted…