5 sexy joke Halloween costumes to spark an evening of ironic intercourse

Halloween. Pumpkins. Candy. Fun parties. And sex you as woman would otherwise feel shame for seeking out. Check out our Halloween guide below to make your perfect costume for trick-or-treating yourself to sexual contact you’re just doing as part of the bit.

2) SEXY SHELDON FROM BIG BANG THEORY - Super embarrassed about liking The Big Bang Theory and extra embarrassed that you have a sexual fantasy about it? Halloween’s your night. Put on a comic book T-Shirt and some skinny jeans, and you can scream out Bazingas as you climax without your partner leaving you forever.
3) SEXY SUPREME COURT JUSTICE - Always wanted to have sex with a convicted felon but couldn’t ever justify it? Build in some plausible deniability to your hookup with a huge book and a long robe. If you’re dressed up as a judge literally no one can question your judgment.
4) SEXY CHILDHOOD CARTOON YOU HAVE SEXUAL FEELINGS FOR - Sorry to say it, but if you’ve dreamed about having sex as Spongebob, this is probably going to take a lot of explaining...except on Halloween! Whether your weirdly specific fantasy is about Doug, Darkwing Duck or an animated Batman, nobody you’re hooking up with will be able to fault you for accidently forgetting to stop talking like Ren and/or Stimpy occasionally.
5) SEXY YOUR OWN MOTHER - Have some Oedipal feelings you haven’t worked out yet but don’t know how to express them? Dressing up as your own mother for a halloween hookup is just the way to get it out of your system. If anyone asks who you are, just tell them you’re one of the parents from Stranger Things and they probably won’t know the difference.

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