VANCOUVER – Based on evidence discovered in a weekly, semi-formal, update email from your aging father, experts believe he may be curious about and in the process of learning more about the…
Tag: dad
Local Dad reaches that age where he smells like a damp library
WINNIPEG – As he enters his late 50s Henry Adamson, father of three and grandfather of two, has, like so many men before him, started to smell like an old library that recently experienced …
Police smash car window to rescue overheated dad still waiting for family to emerge from local mall
BURNABY, BC – Local authorities are once again reminding shoppers of the danger of leaving anyone in a hot car after police were forced to smash a window to rescue local father Dan Coolidge…
Pride weekend leaves local father struggling to accept that his bank is gay
TORONTO – In the wake of Pride weekend celebrations, Canada’s LGBTQ communities are entering the week with a renewed sense of solidarity and purpose. But the events of the weekend have also left …
Dad escalates economic sanctions against son who will not get dressed
STELLARTON, NS – After finding his first round of sanctions ineffective in motivating his 5-year-old son to clothe himself, father of two, John Carlin, has vowed to increase economic penalt…
Ice storm saves conversation with local dad
TORONTO – A brutal late-season ice storm swept through Ontario this weekend, just in time to improve local son James Cougan’s phone conversation with his father. “The storm was pretty nasty, but …
Dad approaches Home Depot employee like a well versed pick-up artist
ETOBICOKE – In what was an entirely nonsexual but definitely premeditated act, reports indicate that local father Peter Edwards, 55, approached Home Depot employee Garrett Sims, 22, with th…
Children to remember local father as constantly tired
FREDERICTON, NB – Local father Andrew Stevens is, according to everyone who knows him, an excellent father who gets the privilege of spending a lot of quality time with his two children, Hu…
Just look at the size of my tomatoes!
By: Your Dad Would you just look at those! Have you ever seen tomatoes that big before? Look at that. Big. Red. Round. Now that’s a tomato. You know, I wasn’t too sure this year because the summe…
Leaving early enough to beat cottage traffic making local dad so fucking wet
OAKVILLE – This morning Chet Billingsley, a local father of three, organized his family into a 5:30 a.m. departure from their home in order to avoid cottage country traffic. As a result of this s…