Man’s stroke ignored at zombie walk
TORONTO – Tragedy struck at Trinity Bellwoods Park yesterday when a man’s stroke symptoms were mistaken for a convincing zombie performance at this year’s Zombie Walk in the Park. Derek Riz…
Local man concerned that if he starts kissing horses, then where will it stop?
BIGGAR, SK – After an unexpectedly intimate moment with his prize-winning mare, Danziger, local businessman and horse breeder Wayland Price said that he feels, “uncomfortable.” “Well, Danzi…
Jen’s dating life totally inconsiderate, says ‘completely platonic’ roommate Darren
TORONTO – Darren Santos, year-long roommate to Jennifer Richards, has finally had enough of the co-ed’s active dating life. “She’s a great girl, but it’s getting to be a bit much,” said San…
Four bankers killed after giant novelty cheque bounces
MISSISSAUGA, ON – After receiving a deposit from a charity golf tournament, four Bank of Montreal employees found out the endorser had insufficient funds the hard way. Two tellers, a mortgage con…
Prince Harry outraged by nude pics of Kate, barely able to masturbate to them
LONDON – Sources within Buckingham Palace have revealed that Prince Harry, currently third in line to the throne, has been so appalled and devastated by the recently leaked pictures of sist…
