My mom is the strongest woman I know besides Gargantua The Mighty
It wasn’t until I became an adult that I appreciated my mother. Growing up, there were many times I wished she would lighten up and not be so strict with me and my siblings. But that was before I…
Suits actor Meghan Markle to marry man living off government assistance
WESTMINSTER – Actress Meghan Markle, who is best known from the television series Suits, is engaged to Henry Charles Albert David who, along with many of his family, is living on government…
Young, ambitious Leafs GM hopes to climb the ladder to better NHL teams
TORONTO – 32-year-old Kyle Dubas has accepted a temporary gig as General Manager of the Toronto Maple Leafs hoping to gain some valuable experience before he moves on to a more successful t…
Emergency Alert System texts ‘U Up?’ at 4am
OTTAWA – Following the nationwide Emergency Alert testing glitch this week that left thousands of Canadians staring expectantly at their phones for a message that never came, the system sou…
QUIZ: What is Neil Young whining about now?
You can hear the unmistakable wheeze of one of rock and roll’s most important singer-songwriters, but you can’t quite make out what his high pitched complaint is about this time. Take this quiz t…
Kathleen Wynne completes third draft of concession speech
TORONTO, ON – Liberal Party leader Kathleen Wynne announced this week that she has finished writing “the best draft yet” of her concession speech for the upcoming Provincial election. “Normally p…
Local man just wants to have a respectful debate with these Libtards
REGINA – Frustrated online commentator Keith Cook doesn’t understand why the cucks he is currently dealing with on facebook won’t engage in a meaningful and healthy dialogue wit…
Quiz: Which Diamond in Diamond & Diamond are you?
Everyone remembers the argument from elementary school. After you and your friends had argued about which teenage mutant ninja turtle everyone was, attention would turn to something far more impo…
Jagmeet Singh suspends entire NDP caucus to be safe
OTTAWA – NDP Leader Jagmeet Singh has announced that he is suspending all of his MPs as a precaution in the event that more members of his caucus are accused of harassment or other forms of…
Latte artist moves into expressionist period
TORONTO – Veteran latte artist Joseph Romano, who has become infamous for his striking works such as “Heart” and “Flower, If You Kinda Squint Your Eyes,” has made a shift in genre fro…
