WASHINGTON, D.C. – The United States government has passed a law making animal cruelty a federal crime, a major step forward in addressing both animal rights issues and the increasingly dir…
U.S.
Bruce Wayne warns wealth tax on billionaires could result in fewer crimes foiled via jet-powered cars
GOTHAM CITY — Following proposals for a wealth tax by Democratic primary candidate Elizabeth Warren, billionaire Bruce Wayne warned this tax could lead to a massive drop in colorful crimina…
Support for impeachment reaches 99% among occupants of White House
WASHINGTON D.C. – Recent polling data has astounded political experts with results suggesting that support for the impeachment of President Donald Trump has reached 99% among those who live and w…
Roger Stone concerned he has not yet been rescued from jailhouse by escape zeppelin
WASHINGTON D.C. — Trump political operative Roger Stone, after having been found guilty on seven counts, is reportedly quite anxious that his previously-arranged escape zeppelin has yet to …
Police concerned as Jane Fonda recidivism climbs by 300%
WASHINGTON, DC—Police have reportedly expressed quiet concern following a disturbing statistic showing actress and activist Jane Fonda’s re-offence rate has nearly quadrupled at an alarming speed…
“You’ll see! One day I’ll be the biggest dancer on Broadway!” sobs Sean Spicer to disapproving dad
EAST BAY, RI — Following his surprisingly successful performances on ABC’s Dancing with the stars, former White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer’s blossoming career in show business collided wit…
Trump still chanting “lock him up” as staffers afraid to break news that baseball fans meant him
WASHINGTON D.C. — Following an appearance at Game 5 of the World Series where attendees overwhelmingly chanted “lock him up”, President Trump has reportedly continued the chant unaware that…
Trump cuts diplomatic ties with Germany after discovering they didn’t help U.S. in World War II either
WASHINGTON, D.C. – The international community was left reeling as the United States announced it was pulling its diplomatic mission out of Berlin after President Trump was informed that, l…
Bernie Sanders released from hospital, promises to be every bit as old as before
LAS VEGAS – While recovering from a sudden heart attack, US Senator and 2020 Presidential candidate Bernie Sanders promised supporters he will return to the race with a renewed commitment t…
GOP Senators: Impeachment may set a dangerous precedent of upholding US constitution
WASHINGTON – A group of GOP Senators have warned that the potential impeachment of President Donald Trump will set a disturbing precedent for all future presidents who may be held accountab…
