WASHINGTON D.C. – Amid the ongoing rumours, lies, and coverups related to President Donald Trump’s relationship to notorious sex offender Jeffrey Epstein, White House officials called a pre…
U.S.
Trump tempted to release Epstein Files just to see own name in print
MAR-A-LAGO, FL – While steadfastly refusing to answer questions surrounding his ties to notorious sex criminal Jeffrey Epstein, U.S. President Donald Trump has reportedly considered releasi…
Breaking: can we get an article posted on Trump’s latest tariff threat before he backs down yet again?
Editor: Ok unnamed writer. Trump just ‘Truthed’ that he was going to do a 35% tariff on all products sent into the U.S. from Canada. And I know the last 15 times he did this we scrambled to write…
Trump urges Americans to just remember whatever bullshit let them support Iraq War
WASHINGTON D.C. – With Trump’s order to bomb Middle Eastern nuclear sites potentially drawing the United States into a war with Iran, the President urged all Americans to recall whate…
McGill says it’s cool if Harvard crashes on their couch until things calm down at home
MONTREAL – McGill University has proposed a temporary living arrangement to Harvard University, allowing the US school to crash on McGill’s couch until such time as things are less crazy at…
Trump reminds Americans he only promised not to start foreign wars
LOS ANGELES – As National Guard troops took to the streets ready to open fire on U.S. citizens in the name of “Making America Great Again”, President Trump reminded all American…
Trump, Musk publicly feud over whose father loved them less
WASHINGTON D.C. – US President Donald Trump has spent the day publicly feuding with former billionaire ally Elon Musk, as the two each insisted that they were shown less affection and atten…
Trump says Canada would pay $61B for Golden Dome, or 50% off just to bribe him directly
WASHINGTON D.C. – US President Donald Trump has offered Canada the “fabulous opportunity” to either pay $61 billion to join his military’s proposed Golden Dome defense shi…
US campaign entices Canada tourists: “Come visit America and also maybe El Salvador!”
OTTAWA – Following months of declining Canadian travel to the USA, Americans have launched a tourism campaign inviting Canadians to visit locations like New York, Austin, and possibly even …
Jewish students at Columbia deported for being anti-Semitic
NEW YORK – Jewish students who chained themselves to the gates of Columbia University have been arrested by ICE and deported for being anti-Semitic terrorists. As the protesting students we…
