MISSION, BC – A very large family of over 700 are disappointed to hear that the Conservative Party of Canada had rejected all of their party memberships under the suspicion that they were a…
Politics
Citing political gender barriers, practical girl dreams of becoming MP’s assistant
VANCOUVER – After much debate and an extensive investigation, honour roll student Nina Periwal, 16, has committed to setting her sights on becoming an MP’s assistant. Periwal had long aspir…
FIFA reminds Trump to leave corruption, racism to the professionals
LONDON – In light of Donald Trump’s travel ban, FIFA president Gianni Infantino has said that the US could be prevented from hosting a future World Cup should the president continue to encr…
Deepak Obhrai Conservative Party Ad
Deepak stands for experience, responsible spending, and leveraging this whole thing into a cushy job.…
Kevin O’Leary vows to prioritize mediocrity over diversity
OTTAWA – A day after declaring the prime minister’s cabinet was mediocre because ‘diversity’ was prioritized, Kevin O’Leary has vowed to prioritize mediocrity instead. “If elected, I will e…
Leitch releases ‘Canadian values’ questions designed to catch the most honest terrorists
OTTAWA — Conservative Leadership candidate Kellie Leitch has released her list of “Canadian values test” questions, which she promises will catch terrorists provided they never, ever tell a…
Chris Alexander denies claim that he is Chucky doll
Our conservative party funded ads continue today with leadership candidate Chris Alexander.…
Quebec prison features first all-politician basketball team
MONTREAL – A Quebec prison now showcases a basketball team exclusively made up of former municipal and provincial politicians within the penitentiary’s sports league. While the squad …
Premier Kathleen Wynne to cut hydro rates from WHAT THE FUCK? to Holy Shit!
TORONTO – In an effort to make Ontario hydro bills more affordable, Premier Kathleen Wynne announced a 25% cut in electricity rates this year, bringing the average monthly bill down from th…
Kellie Leitch jumps in polls after eating live dove during leadership debate
OTTAWA – Kellie Leitch has emerged as a favourite in the Conservative leadership race after a strong showing at the Manning debate wherein she devoured an entire live dove to the raucous ap…
