TORONTO, ON ― Local Toronto Police Service officer Jeremy Moriarty took great care during an initially routine traffic stop this week to unnecessarily escalate the situation to a degree of violen…
Law
Court rules convoy must return to Ottawa after finding Emergencies Act unreasonable
OTTAWA – Following the ruling that the Liberal government’s 2022 use of the Emergencies Act was unreasonable, a Federal judge has ordered that all convoy protestors be welcomed back t…
Weird, did you know they have conservatorships for men too?
Stop what you’re doing and prepare to panic. A new examination of American law has found that even male adults can be placed under a conservatorship. While statistically unlikely, it seems …
Law and Order: Toronto to follow exciting story of police ignoring gay community about serial killer
Toronto, ON – Producers of the exciting Law and Order series centering around crimes related to Toronto finally revealed what crime the pilot episode will look at. “We’re very excited to ha…
Jury rules wife beater is bigger celebrity than beaten wife
FAIRFAX, VA – At the Fairfax County Circuit Courthouse a jury has reached a verdict: that known wife beater Johnny Depp is indeed more famous than Amber Heard, his beaten ex-wife. “This ver…
Feminist Win! Supreme Court abortion draft validates what women have been screaming about for years
WASHINGTON D.C. — After a draft opinion was leaked from the Supreme Court yesterday stating the Court’s intention to overturn Roe v. Wade, feminists across the country celebrated finally be…
Opinion: If corporations can be tried as individuals, then why can’t my ex-boyfriend’s improv team?
TORONTO – The legal doctrine known as corporate personhood states that corporations can be sued just like individual people. So if I can sue a corporation, why the hell can’t I sue my ex-boyfrien…
Sperm banks unfreeze man’s assets
OTTAWA – In response to an ongoing criminal case, Canadian sperm banks have unfrozen accused criminal Charles Grieg’s significant portfolio of assets. Grieg, 47, is facing numerous fraud charges…
Inventor of the children’s toy Slime thrown in jail for 34 consecutive life sentences
LOS ANGELES – Chemist/Toy Inventor George Earnshaw, the inventor of the children’s toy Slime, has been sentenced to 34 consecutive life sentences for ruining countless lives and rugs around…
Giuliani to appeal law suspension all the way up to Supreme Court Total Landscaping
NEW YORK CITY – After being suspended from practising law in New York State due to his many “misleading statements” as personal lawyer to former President Trump, Rudy Giuliani has angrily v…