TORONTO – For years Connor McDavid has been seen as the fastest force in hockey but now insiders are wondering whether he has been bested by a new competitor: the sponsors getting away from…
Tory assures voters he only needs one more term to make Toronto as inhospitable as it is expensive
TORONTO – Running for re-election Mayor John Tory has promised voters that, with just one more term, he can complete his mission to make Toronto just as terrible to live in as it is crippli…
Hockey fans training hard to get into peak trash talking shape
MONTREAL – Local Habs fan Jeff Donoghue says he needs just a few more training sessions before he is in mid-season trash talking shape. “Other off-seasons I’ve kind of let my ga…
Huh. Via Train just started going backwards
Belleville(ish), ON – The Via Train from Toronto to Montreal that has been stopped somewhere around Belleville for the last twenty minutes has started going backwards and everyone on board …
Pierre Poilievre hopes to inspire future generations of kids who carry briefcases in high school to enter politics
OTTAWA – Adapting to his role as Conservative Party Leader, Pierre Poilievre is hoping to use his position not just to advocate for his positions but to inspire future generations of kids w…
‘Alberta Is Calling’ ads lure Ontarians with chance to live in Province that is fucked up in a slightly different way
TORONTO – Alberta’s provincial government has launched a full court press to convince Ontarians sick and tired of dealing with all the Province’s problems to move to Alberta so …
Liberals drop COVID restrictions now that ‘keeping people alive’ no longer polls well
OTTAWA – The government has announced that, as of October 1st, the border vaccine rules, travel mask mandates and mandatory use of the ArriveCan app will no longer be in force, now that kee…
Weird! Everyone you know currently sick with the disease from that Pandemic that ended a while ago
Well this is odd! It seems that nearly every friend and family member in your life is currently testing positive for COVID-19, the disease from the 2020-2021 Pandemic. “I mean obviously bas…
I know we’ve called every Conservative Leader for the last 7 years a right-wing extremist, but this time we mean it
By Justin Trudeau As you know The Conservative Party of Canada has selected Pierre Poilievre as their new Party Leader. Unfortunately I have to warn you that Mr. Poilievre is a dangerous right-wi…
Everything you need to know about Pierre Poilievre
Pierre Poilievre has been elected leader of the Conservative Party of Canada. And if you didn’t follow the race closely you might be wondering ‘who is this person?’ Is he horrib…
